Janemba! Janemba! Janemba!
by Madam Captain
Summary: The crazy story of how Janemba freed itself from the containment device and ended up distorting the entire Otherworld. This story also has a wacky twist in it. A plot twist, not the kind of twist one gets in their body that could cause internal damage.


Disclaimer: The Rights to DBZ owns Akira Toriyama. _Fascinating._

.---------------------.

Many years had passed since the defeat of Cell, no one was really sure of _how_ many years exactly, they just knew that It'd been quite a while. The world was at peace, well except when Bojack tried to attack it... and Brolly, twice. Oh! And that was that time where a creature made entirely out of ghosts tried to enslave the world using Brolly, what a wacky time that was!… You never saw it? Really? It was on the news, I figured everyone knew about it.

C'mon! 'Giant ghost creature enslaves world, Japan prepares its Samurai Army!'

Ring a bell?

No?

Oh well, moving on.

Anyway the world was now at peace, it had been a whole three weeks since the last attack, a new record for planet Earth. They celebrated it by doing what they usually did, gape stupidly at the first person who flew by despite the fact that they knew about it way back when Piccolo decided to rule the world. They weren't exactly the smartest creatures in the Universe. That belonged to the _Xazas_, a race of gigantic brains who were so smart they realized that without other organs they couldn't actually live, needless to say, they didn't last very long, or… at all really. I think I had a point to this story at one time. Oh yeah!

Down in Hell, things were rather peaceful, if that makes any sense at all. Tank Boy was as usual listening to his Walkman, and wouldn't you know it, his job was looking after a massive tank of souls. Well, it's not exactly like you could go for any other occupation with the name 'Tank Boy.' Regardless, he was mucking around and thus couldn't see the light of the soul tank flashing dangerously. Even if he did see the light, he wouldn't of known what it meant. The choice of looking after the tank was either between him or a rotten, diseased apple.

Frankly, I would have gone with the apple.

Explosions shook the entire complex, causing Yemma to fall off his chair in a comical manner, but sadly without any zany sound effects. Tight budget, you see. The soul tank had reached critical level and was now releasing all the evil that every soul in the afterlife had ever had. Which brings up the question of _why_ do they even have a Hell there? I mean, if the evil in their souls was extracted using the machine that would mean that the person would no longer have any evil. So, Hell is pretty much pointless, unless this is all a plot to try and cover-up the existence of Bigfoot, those crafty devils!

The soul tank could not last any longer and created a massive explosion, sending all the evil towards Tank Boy, oh no! Smoke and dust surrounded the nearby area, which was just silly because no one had fired a massive Ki-Blast in order to try and defeat a major villain. A generic worker rushed down the stairs into the area where Tank Boy was last seen, Generic Worker didn't like his job, he wanted to feel the wind in his hair! The soft sand in-between his toes! That weird feeling you get when you put something really cold on your front upper teeth. Live the dream, buddy!

Generic Worker didn't even get any time to say a snappy one-liner before the smoke cleared and before him stood a.. yellow, blob.. thing. You'd think for a creature that contains possibly billions of years worth of evil would look cool, like some sort of Mecha-Ninja with a monocle in one eye and an eye-patch for the other and half of his body would be nothing but lasers or something. Oh well, the yellow blob thing sat there with a confused look on it's face before it expanded to an amazingly large size, destroying a good portion of the building where the tank, and King Yemma resided.

Everywhere in the otherworld, things started to get distorted. Rocks and people started turning into Jelly-Bean type objects, a few clouds simply walked along as all this was happening, they knew that it was just a side effect of all the drinking they had done that night. A few minutes later they died of alcohol poisoning, poor guys. Back at Yemma's building, the yellow blob sat on top of the jelly-bean that had now encased the object and opened it's mouth slowly to say it's name.

**Janemba! Janemba! Janemba!**

Boy! I can sure rant when I want to, eh? Never knew I had it in me. It gave the doctors quite a shock, let me tell you!

No, I won't _actually_ tell you, get back here!

Far off in another part of the otherworld, Goku and Pikkon were fighting a battle that technically should have happened several years ago. Well, I know Dragonball fights can drag on for a while, but a few _years_? Come on! That's just silly. Anyway, Goku and Pikkon were fighting a rather unimpressive battle, unless you think prancing around the arena like a twit is impressive. You do? Oh well, sucks to be you then. Or something.

"Haha!" Pikkon laughed, as one usually does when they say 'Haha!' "I have you now Son Goku!"

"Or so you think!" Goku grinned. "But little did you know that you've _ACTIVATED MY TRAP CARD!_"

"Your trap what?"

"My trap card! Vegeta - The Plot Device, allows me to summon any plot device to end this battle! It's over, KAIBA!"

"What the hell are you babbling about?" Pikkon glared at the Saiyan before an explosion rocked the arena, this particular explosion froze in mid-combustion. Which is most certainly different than the type that just explodes, killing everyone within a mile radius. Hehe, stupid kids never saw it coming.

"See!" Goku gloated. "A plot-device! I was right! And now if you'll excuse me, I am off to eat a lot of food in a comedic mann----"

_Rather convincing story wasn't it? But no, readers. This isn't a retelling of Dragonball Z: Movie 12, you see. You have just run right into a trap!_

_Not the type involving nets or electric prodding devices though. No, you have run into..._

**----Cell: Master of Insanity - Movie Special: Holy crap! Only 45 minutes! I paid for this?----**

_What, you haven't read the original? Then go do so, right now! With you teeth if you must!_

_Or your eyes, whatever is easier._

_Now to begin to actual story!_

.---------------------.

Namekians fled in terror as a mysterious foe flew behind them, emitting all sorts of creepy noises. Every moment another Namekian would be struck down by this foe. A lone Namekian child managed to flee into a nearby cave, only for the creature to shortly corner him. The child only managed to emit a scream before the creature attacked him.

Interesting, eh? Well too bad. This event has nothing to do with the story what so ever as will never looked upon again. Nor does it contain Brolly in any form.

LOOK OVER THERE!

.-.

"Day fifty-six of our journey to New Namek." Piccolo mumbled to himself inside the space ship. "Dende said 'Hello' to me. This is further evidence that he is a hostile alien life form, his plan? To strike up a conversation with me. But I won't let him! OH NO I WILL NOT!"

"Hello" Dende walked by Piccolo.

"GET AWAY FROM MY BLOOD!"

"What?"

"Oh, you'd like to know wouldn't you, Dende. Or should I say.. 'ZINTHOR FROM DIMENSION NTH?'"

"Well.. no you shouldn't call me that."

"And why would that be? Hmm. HMM?"

"Because it's not my name, you know that."

"...Alright." Piccolo shrugged and walked off to another part of the wes--vessel.

.-.

"Alright, we are making a lot of progress today." A lady spoke out to a group. "And what about you Tenshinhan? Why are you here for?"

"I tried to make the entire Universe collapse."

"Interesting!" The lady nodded. "I think we can all honestly say we've tried that at least one in our life-time."

"_I have! I'm doing it right now!_"

"Of course you are, Cerxena." The lady patted his shoulder. "Of course you are."

"_You dare make contact with me? I WILL DESTROY YOUR BONES! OH YES!.. Once I open up the door to the World of XzXxzsazzZ!"_

"I sense hostility towards your father.."

.-.

Meanwhile, deep within the Earth.. Well not deep within it. Seeing as it would be so dense and hot that no one could possibly live there. I meant that it was inside the Earth in a location that is not considered normal for humans to visit by today's standards. This particular place was inside a mountain. What? People frequently visit the innards of mountains? Oh. Okay then. Let us start over then.

Meanwhile, inside a location that certain professions allow people to visit for the purposes of mining, building and/or tunneling facilities. A mechanical chamber slowly opened.

"Awake! Awake my creation!" A scientist cackled. "You have been designed to hunt down Son Goku and terminate him!"

"Sir. Son Goku has been dead for nearly seven years now." A henchman stated.

"Really?"

"Yeah."

"Well... _shit_. Now what am I meant to do with my creation?"

"Attack his child?"

"Son Goku had a child?"

"You built a machine to kill him and you didn't know that?"

"Hey! I don't even know who Son Goku is! I'm just a one-dimensional scientist who's only purpose is to create a poorly written villain for this particular plot."

"That must suck."

"Eh, it's a living."

"Sooo... attack his child?" The scientist shrugged.

"Sure, why the hell not."

"KAKAROTTO!"

"No! Brolly!" The scientist screamed as the Saiyan advanced on him.

"Wow!" The henchman gasped. "It's as if he is going to kill you just to point out that he is in fact evil and will need to be killed by the heroes!"

"KAKAROTTO!"

"Which brings up an interesting question." The henchman scratched his head. "I though Brolly was working down at the mall. How did he die and manage to be created once more?"

.-.

_Several weeks ago._

"Excuse me? Sir?" A woman walked up to Brolly and tapped his shoulder. "Yes. I was wondering if you could tell my the price of this here monocle?"

"KAKAROTTO!"

"That is simply way too much! I shall take my business elsewhere. Good day, sir!"

"Brolly!" The manager walked up to the Saiyan and hit him. "That the fifth costumer this week you've let go!"

"KAKAROTTO!"

Brolly started twitching wildly before his body gave way and just exploded, sending chunks of him all over the manager. "Oh that's it! YOU'RE FIRED!"

"_AHA!_" The scientist ran into the store. "DNA! I shall use this to create an evil creature who will destroy you all!.. Providing your name is Son Goku."

"My name is Son Goku..."

"THEN YOU SHALL DIE!" The scientist ran out of the store cackling evilly.

"Oh _wait_." The costumer slapped his head. "My name is Barry. Silly me!"

.-.

"That's an incredibly shallow back-story, you know."

"Yeah, I know." The scientist shrugged. "But it's better than what Brolly ever ha—ARGH! MY GONADS!"

"KAKAROTTO!"

.-.

Meanwhile, at the Son house. The house where the Son family lived, not the house where the Sun lived, the Sun doesn't have a house. Anyway, Gohan and Chi-Chi decided to confront Goku on his rapidly growing insanity. How did they know he was going insane? Well, they kind of got a hunch when Goku was screaming about the potted plant in the kitchen secretly being Bojack. Also, why wasn't Goku dead? The answer to that is simple, you see. Goku liked eating food. He liked it so much that he mistook Kaioshin's head for being a donut. Long story less long, he was sent back to Earth in secret. But he was still insane, just making sure.

"Uh… Father, can we talk to you for a second."

"Sure thing." Goku smiled before glancing over his shoulder. "Just keep an eye on that weird looking omelet, I think it's gone bad."

"That's Goten."

"Oh. Hi Goten!"

"Dad!" Gohan sighed. "Me and mother both fear that you're going… well, insane."

"Haha!" Goku chuckled "There's no way I can go insane. I am a full blooded sane-yan, you know!"

"That's '_Saiyan_', dad."

"What? Why wasn't I informed of this sooner!"

"Goku!" Chi-Chi hollered at her husband. "We can't have you walking around the house being insane, imagine what it'll do to Goten!"

"Goten already is insane, mum. Just the other day he said that he defeated Brolly using _water_."

"I though Krillin did that." Goku scratched his head.

"I thought that hadn't happened yet." Goten chimed in.

"He's right, you know." Chi-Chi crossed her arms. "Regardless, we have to lock Goku up so he doesn't go flying about embarrassing himself."

"I agree." Gohan grabbed his father by the shoulders and threw him into a nearby room. "Done and done!"

"What's stopping him from blowing up the room?" Goten asked.

Gohan walked up to Goten and smacked him upside his head, yeah, Gohan was awesome like that. "Foolish Goten, that is the room that inexplicably drains your power away. Also, we have never discussed this room before. But it has always been there!"

"That makes _perfect_ sense, why didn't I think of that?"

Meanwhile in the kitchen, the potted plant started laughing evilly.

.-.

High above, a Saiyan space pod was just entering the atmosphere. The Saiyan had come a long way in order to be here, for in fact, it was a female Saiyan. Vegeta's sister to be exact. But sadly for her, she miscalculated her speed of entry and slammed into the Earth at three hundred miles per hour. She died. Thus saving the world from another story about Vegeta having a sister.

What? That had nothing to do with the story what so ever? Oh silly me and my ramblings!

.-.

"Frieza, I'm bored. Are we at the Queen's yet?" Dodoria complained and they walked along the road.

"No, it will take some time before we see the Queen!"

"_Why_ are we doing this? Couldn't you of just destroyed Garlic Jr?"

"How could I? He's invincible."

"Apparently not if he's in _Hell_!"

"… You raise a valid point, good sir. But we shall continue onwards anyway."

"Damn."

.-.

A space ship landed on one of the many plains on Namek. There was an eerie silence about, well it wasn't eerie, it was one of those silences where you really _really_ want to do something funny in order to break it, but you just can't think of anything at the time. I hate those. Anyway, Piccolo and the group exited their craft and looked about. Craters covered the surface of the planet.

"Holy crap!" Nail screamed. "Craters have landed and are taking over the planet!"

"That doesn't make any sense!" Dende sighed.

"Sure it does, once you get through the fact that craters aren't actual life forms, so they can't invade planets."

"Help… us." A Namekian warrior crawled up to the group. "You have… to save us."

"You're wrong Nail." Piccolo pointed. "It's these Namekians that are invading the planet. DIE!"

"No… it's… BLARGH!"

"_We_ are the Namekians, you twit." Dende smacked Piccolo.

"Well why didn't you tell me before I killed him? Yeesh, some guardian you are!"

Dende somehow managed to subside the urge to smack Piccolo into orbit. "Let's just look around, maybe we can find what killed them."

"The Namekians, I already told you that."

"Shut up, Piccolo!"

.-.

The potted plant decided to make its move during the middle of the night. Well it wasn't a potted plant anymore, he had already transformed into Bojack. He was crafty like that. Anyway, Bojack quickly snuck out the front door, making sure that Goku saw who he was.

"Hahaha!" Bojack laughed using his disturbingly deep voice. "Now I am free of that horrid containment chamber. Time to destroy the world!"

"No, don't!" Goku pleaded with the monster.

"What? Why not?"

"Because the Earth is nice, trust me."

"Give me an example."

"Well because… **KAMEHAMEHA!**"

"You have no powers while you are in that room, remember?"

"… Oh, hell."

"Now if you'll excuse me. I am off to destroy the world."

"Fine, have your fun." Goku pouted as Bojack flew away.

"Goku, was that you making all that noise?" Chi-Chi asked as she opened her bedroom door.

"Oh Chi-Chi, I'm so glad you're here." Goku smiled. "I was right, the potted plant really _is_ Bojack, he just broke free and is now going to destroy the world!"

"You expect me to believe that."

"You believed me when I said that Gohan was a rabid monkey who could destroy the world given half a chance."

"No, it's not. This is the first time I've heard of that."

"Whoops!"

"Good-night, Goku." Chi-Chi sighed as she went back into the bedroom.

.-.

"KAKAROTTO!"

"Oh no!" The henchman gasped "It seems as if Brolly has now destroyed the lab and is on his away to destroying the world. And thus ends my amazing chapter, for you see, I no longer have a purpose in this story. So if you don't mind, I'm just going to self-destruct now. Goodbye."

.-.

"Wow!" Nail gasped. "What is this thing!"

"I know this place." Piccolo mumbled to himself.

_Cut and slice and chop them up!_

"That voice… that terrible voice!"

"What's wrong Piccolo?"

_Cut and slice and chop them up!_

"It's the robot from back when Meta-Cooler was destroying Namek!"

"So we are in.."

"Correct! The Big Gete Star!"

"Oh, I thought we were in some sort of ninja dojo." Nail shrugged.

"Why would you think that?" Dende questioned.

"Because that robot is wearing a ninja costume."

_Cut and slice and chop them up!_

"Quickly gang! Assume the Namekian poses!" Piccolo demanded "It's our only hope!"

"But we don't have any unicycles." Nail pointed out.

"And whose fault is that?"

"Guru's?"

"WHAT?"

"Seriously, why is Guru in our group?" Dende asked.

"I have no idea, but right now we have a robot ninja to destroy!"

_Cut and slice and chop them up!_

.-.

At the mental institution, Tenshinhan and the chef were getting into their daily fight.

"I WANT MY SLAW!"

"YOU HAVE YOUR SLAW, SIR!"

"I WANT MY SLAW!"

"YOU HAVE YOUR SLAW, SIR!"

"I WANT MY SLAW!"

"YOU HAVE YOUR SLAW, SIR!"

"I WANT MY SLAW!"

"YOU HAVE YOUR SLAW, SIR!"

"I WANT MY SLAW!"

"YOU HAVE YOUR SLAW, SIR!"

"I WANT MY SLAW!"

"YOU HAVE YOUR SLAW, SIR!"

"I WANT MY SLAW!"

"YOU HAVE YOUR SLAW, SIR!"

"I WANT MY SLAW!"

"Tenshinhan?" The nurse walked up to the man. "There is someone here to see you."

"Alright." Tenshinhan quickly glared at the chef. "My slaw better be here when I get back!"

"Ten!" Yamcha cried out as he saw the man approach. "We need your help!"

"What on Earth for?"

"Bojack is back and he's going to destroy the Universe, we need someone to help us defeat him!"

"So? Why not get Gohan or Vegeta to do it?"

"Gohan and his family have flown off somewhere to help an insane family mate, and Vegeta is off trying to find Brolly."

"Brolly is back? How many times would this make it?"

"I have no idea, I lost count when he came back to steal Christmas that one time."

"I remember that. Was that before or after he returned to try and steal some of Goku's mustard?"

"After, I believe."

"Yeah, that was a crappy reason to come back to life."

"Well it _is_ Brolly."

"Point taken." Tenshinhan said. "So you need me to fight Bojack?"

"Yup, are you ready?"

"Sure, just let me get my slaw---" Tenshinhan quickly dove his hand into his pocket and pulled out some slaw. "Hey! It was here the whole time."

.-.

_Cut and slice and chop them up!_

"How did we lose to some horrid robot?" Nail sighed.

"You didn't even fight!" Dende pointed out. "You and Piccolo just stood there doing ridiculous poses using a laptop and Guru just sat there doing nothing, as usual."

"WHAT?"

"SHUT UP, GURU!"

"And I'll have you know that our poses are what give us power!" Piccolo stated.

"Does chanting the lyrics to _Lollypop_ also give you power?"

"Stop judging me! I have feelings, you know."

_Cut and slice and chop them up!_

"Soooo…" Nail tried to quickly change subject "What do you think this robot will do to us?

"…"

.-.

"Are we there _yet_?" Dodoria complained.

"Yes, my silly fiend. We are here!" Frieza giggled oddly as they both stood before the palace of Hell. It was hot pink and had Unicorns prancing the endless daisy fields around it.

"Ugh. This place gives me nightmares! It's more horrible than I could ever imagine!" Dodoria managed to say without throwing up.

"Zarbon x Vegeta yaoi…"

"ARGH MY SKULL! Why did you have to say that?

"It took your mind off the palace, did it not?"

"… I really friggin' hate you."

"Come on, let's go meet the Queen."

Frieza and Dodoria walked up the rainbow stairs and entered the magnificent marble palace, at the very end of the main hall was a massive pink fluffy throne. Why it was pink? No-one knew, but anyway, who should be seated upon it but…

"What the hell are you doing there?" Frieza screamed.

"Funny story." Cell tapped the end of his gentleman pipe. "After I was put into a wacky chamber by the disembodied voice of the realm that should have never existed, I was sent to this here palace. Miss Goinklebutt, the previous Queen wondered what I was doing here, so I killed her, thus making me the Que—King of Hell!"

"That's the most retarded story I've ever heard." Frieza smacked his forehead.

"Well too bad. I'm King of Hell and there's nothing you can do about it!" Cell laughed. "Which reminds me, I've made Garlic Jr the official owner of every shop in Hell."

"You bastard!"

"Also, Frieza, you are to be sent to Earth with none of your powers tomorrow. Have a nice day!"

"You won't get away with this?"

"Why not?"

"Uh… I don't know. I just thought I'd be dramatic."

"Well it didn't work."

"Hey! Don't make me caress your Dragonballs!"

.-.

"Mother. Why are we flying dad out to Mars?" Gohan asked

"So we can get him away from Earth."

"But the lack of oxygen will kill him."

"Nonsense! Saiyans can go through space without breathing."

"No they can't."

"Yes they can! I saw it on television earlier this week."

"Why would Saiyans be on television?"

"Vegeta was going to destroy the moon."

"Why?"

"Because he didn't like the thought of something's face being bigger than his."

"Fair enough. To Mars!"

.-.

"How can this be?" Vegeta asked himself as Brolly quickly advanced on him. "I am the Prince of all Saiyans! He should be nothing to me!"

"KAKAROTTO!"

"That does it! Time to use my ultimate attack. FIRE RANDOM KI-BLASTS!" Vegeta screamed as he fired… well, random Ki blasts at Brolly, but for some reason they were having no effect. "What? Whenever I fire multiple weak Ki-Blasts at major villains in the past it always killed them… no, wait. I think I died as a result of that. Oh _shit_."

"KAKAROTTO!"

"Nothing can save me now, except for… THIS INANIMATE STAPLER!" Vegeta cried in triumph as he chucked the stapler at Brolly, and wouldn't you know it, the damn guy exploded into a thousand pieces.

"KA…KA…ROOO…TTO!"

"Silly Brolly!" Vegeta spat on the ground where the Legendary Super Saiyan once was.

"How did you know that stapler would work?" Krillin asked.

"Simple really, after being brought back so many times, Brolly now has a major weakness to stupidly simple objects."

"Oh, like that time where Brolly came back to sell Goku faulty car insurance and he was defeated by a shoehorn?"

"Yeah, sure. Now if you don't mind, your baldness is starting to blind me. I must flee!" Vegeta called out as he flew off into the distance!

.-.

"Damn! Who would of thought that a being who could kill Super Saiyans would be such trouble to us Humans?" Yamcha questioned as both he and Tenshinhan were sent flying back by Bojack's Ki.

"Silly Yamcha!" Tenshinhan smiled. "The only way for Bojack to be defeated is for a person to teleport out of heaven and knock him down while giving us the courage and power to defeat him!"

"Of course, why didn't I think of that?"

So the two waited and waited for someone to appear and save the day! Now, Bojack has incredibly short patience, so this didn't exactly go over so well. That is to say, Tenshinhan and Yamcha were under twenty tons of rubble by this stage. But out of nowhere! A heavenly being came to save the day! It was… Gertrude, the fluffy white cloud! The cloud slammed right into Bojack and… didn't do a damned thing. Well it _is_ a cloud, for God's sake!

"Sorry guys." Gertrude apologized. "All the fighters are off having a sexy party, so I had to come here."

"Well can you at least give us the power to save the day?" Yamcha asked.

"Sorry, I have a cold. But if you'd like, I could give you the power to possibly make Bojack come down with the flu."

"We'll pass."

"You sure? The flu can make one very uncomfortable!"

"Yeah, we're sure."

"Well, okay then." Gertrude sighed. "Sorry I couldn't do more to help you guys. Seeya!"

"Yeah, bye Gertrude…" Tenshinhan sighed as he climbed out of the rubble.

"What the hell was that meant to be?" Bojack asked the two humans.

"To be honest, we have no bloody idea!" Yamcha sighed.

"Look, Yamcha! My hand his glowing with power!" Tenshinhan laughed. "Gertrude _did_ give us the power to save the day!"

"No, that's _Bojack's_ hand glowing with power. And he's about the use it to kill us!"

"Oh…"

.-.

_Cut and slice and chop them up!_

"Oh dear!" Nail gasped, he did that a lot as you can see. It really annoyed the other members of the group. Kind of like how my rambling is annoying you right now. See? Isn't this fun? Whee!

No, come back, I'll be good. Anyway, Nail gasped, as he did every other scene. "He is going to use us to power to Big Gete Star!"

_Wrong, I just love cutting and slicing people! For I am a robot and that is what we do. Besides be awesome._

"What awesome things have you done?" Piccolo asked.

_What awesome things have I done? I am a meter high robot who is also a ninja and beat up every single person on this planet for the sole purpose of cutting them up. Is that proof enough?_

"No."

_Well, fine. I also eat nails for breakfast without using milk and I install software onto my computer… without closing all other applications first!_

"He's a madman!" Nail shuddered in fear. "Our death is imminent!"

"Pfft. I know the secret in destroying him!" Piccolo chuckled.

_And what... cut and slice… is that?_

"RUN AWAY!" Piccolo screamed as he and the group quickly fled the Big Gete Star and got onto their space ship.

"What about all the other Namekians? And the planet for that matter?" Dende asked.

"Did _you_ want to fight that madman?"

"No… but still. We came here to defeat the menace capturing and killing the Namekians, not run away from it after we found out it was the most awesome robot in the Universe!"

"Less logical thinking more escaping! FIRE THE ENGINES!" Piccolo screamed as the space ship quickly flew off into the sky. Down below them, New Namek quickly fell apart as the Big Gete Star devoured the important minerals needed to power itself. So yeah... New Namek was no more.

"Well some heroes we turned out to be…" Dende sighed.

"WHAT?"

"But, you know…" Piccolo looked out the window where the Big Gete Star was. I have learnt an important lesson today!"

"And what's that?" Nail asked.

"That life is a lot like a fruit box! Oh sure it tastes great and is low in fat… but in the end you only contain 5 of the actual fruit."

"What the _hell_ are you talking about?" Dende yelled. "This job sucks, I want to go back to the peaceful life of being the Guardian of Earth!"

"Well…" Nail sheepishly chuckled. "I kind of gave that position to Mr. Popo…"

"You _what_?"

"Please, Mr. Popo is a kind man, he's perfect for the role."

.-.

"Guardian of Earth, eh?" Mr. Popo twiddled his thumbs as he sat on the throne. "I don't like that country over there. I think I'll have it destroyed!"

.-.

"Fine!" Dende pouted. "Let's go home anyway."

"We can't, the robot just destroyed it." Nail pointed out.

"Fine, let's go to... Yardrat!"

"Hurray!" The group shouted and plotted the course into their space ship.

.-.

"Well it looks like this is the end!" Yamcha cried out to Tenshinhan as Bojack stood only meters away from then. But then, something amazing happened! The store down the street was having a 50 all clothing sale, hurrah! Oh, that and Goku came and punched Bojack away from them.

"Goku? What are you doing here?"

"Funny story." Goku slapped his knee and chuckled. "Anyway, I'm back and I knew that Bojack was a potted plant but Gohan and Chi-Chi thought I was insane so they flew me to Mars for some reason, then they saw that Bojack was destroying Earth with their newly found 'Look for the nearest plot-device' eye powers, crazy! Anyway, here I am, ready to defeat Bojack!"

"Could you say that again? I kind of lost track when you started going insane." Yamcha sighed.

"I'm not crazy!" Goku jumped up and down in anger. "I'm not, I'm not, I'm not!"

"Hello! Big angry blue alien gypsy with a disturbingly deep voice over here!" Bojack called out.

"Oh, right. Bojack!" Goku slapped his forehead. "I nearly forgot!"

"Going to kill me?"

"Yup! Using my incredibly awesome transformation into _Super Saiyan 3_!" Goku laughed.

"Pansy!" Gohan screamed out.

"Hmph! Anyway, now to transform!" Goku yelled as he well… turned Super Saiyan 3, I'd describe how, but you wouldn't be able to see it anyway. Shame.

"Hello!" Vegeta walked up to the group. "Just thought I'd drop in to---- Is Goku a Super Saiyan 3?"

Tenshinhan nodded.

"Excuse me." Vegeta quickly turned around. "I am going to go kill myself. Goodbye."

"Seeya." Gohan waved to Vegeta before seeing Bojack's skull fly right past him and into the back of Vegeta's head, knocking him out cold.

"I think I overdid it." Goku chuckled before reverting back to normal.

.-.

"Well, Frieza!" Cell lounged back on his throne. "Your powers have been taken away, enjoy your life on Earth."

"You can't do this to me, I MADE YOU!"

"No you didn't."

"Right." Frieza clicked his fingers. "You see, you're not meant to know that!"

"I see… well, you're going to Earth anyway, bye!"

"Damn you Cell, I'll get my revenge!"

.-.

"That was rather anti-climatic." Tenshinhan said in disappointment.

"It's the death of the movie's villain. Of course it's anticlimactic!" Chi-Chi pointed out.

"And now!" Gohan raised his hands into the air for no reason. "Goku will say something that we think is hilarious and everything will end happily ever after!"

Goku winced. "I think I broke my leg…"

"Hahahahaha, that's our crazy old Goku!" The rest of the group chuckled.

"No, seriously. It friggin' hurts. I need a senzu bean!"

"Hahahaha…"

.-.

_Cut and slice and chop them up!_

"Ha. Now what?" A random Namekian scoffed. "You've destroyed our planet, your power is going to run out soon!"

_No, it's not. Just look outside the window._

"Oh no! It's Earth."

"Wait!" Another Namekian butted in. "How would you know its Earth. No-one has ever said that name to us, or even given us a description of the planet."

"We are characters used for a cheap plot-device. We know everything providing it advances the plot."

"Oh yeah."

_I shall enjoy cutting and slicing them all! Oh… and chopping them all, hahahaha!_

.-.

"Ugh. Where am I?" Frieza rubbed his head. He stood up to take a look at his surroundings. "… 'Capsule Corp'? What the hell is that?"

**THE END**

_And so ends this horrid little story, sorry to all those who came in here expecting the epic story about Janemba!_

_But if it means anything to you, Gogeta… uh, kills him in a cool way!_

_Oh well, now Frieza has to live on Earth without powers, wacky!_

_Thanks for reading._

_Seeya!_


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